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THE LAUGHLINE - another humor site that has a huge collection of great jokes, plus funny pictures and videos as well. I definitely recommend a visit if you are in the mood for some laughter.
TEN WORDS THAT DON'T EXIST BUT SHOULD
1. AQUADEXTROUS (ak wa deks'trus) adj. Possessing the ability
to turn
the bathtub tap on and off with your toes.
2. CARPERPETUATION (kar'pur pet u a shun) n. The act, when
vacuuming,
of running over a string or a piece of lint at least
a dozen times, reaching over
and picking it up, examining it, then putting it back
down to give the vacuum
one more chance.
3. DISCONFECT (dis kon fekt') v. To sterilize the piece of confection
(lolly)
you dropped on the floor by blowing on it, assuming
this will somehow 'remove'
all the germs.
4. ELBONICS (el bon'iks) n. The actions of two people maneuvering
for one
armrest in a movie theater.
5. FRUST (frust) n. The small line of debris that refuses to
be swept onto the dust
pan and keeps backing a person across the room until
he finally decides to give
up and sweep it under the rug.
6. LACTOMANGULATION (lak' to man gyu lay' shun) n. Manhandling
the "open
here" spout on a milk container so badly that one has
to resort to the 'illegal' side.
7. PEPPIER (peph ee ay') n. The waiter at a fancy restaurant
whose sole purpose
seems to be walking around asking diners if they want
fresh ground pepper.
8. PHONESIA (fo nee' zhuh) n. The affliction of dialing a phone
number and forgetting
whom you were calling just as they answer.
9. PUPKUS (pup'kus) n. The moist residue left on a window after
a dog presses its
nose to it.
10. TELECRASTINATION (tel e kras tin ay' shun) n. The act of always letting
the phone
ring at least twice before you pick it up, even when
you're only six inches away.